nothing in particular...

I've felt like crying a lot lately.

But praise God, halleluiah, thank the Lord, it's been because of good reasons!

Like when I get so caught up in the beauty and grace of my saviour that I lose it and want to weep because of His goodness.

Or like the dream I had last night about being in England again and standing in the middle of a street in York crying because I was so darn happy to be back. I felt like I was home, and the rest of my life I've just been homesick.

Anyway, so yeah, I've felt like crying a lot, sure. But for the first time in a long time it's been tears of joy. Thank God.

Also a new development: I don't feel the need to post on facebook every sad song I hear to show how I'm feeling to a certain someone anymore. I want to laugh at myself for ever doing that in the first place. lol
No, now when I hear a new sad or hreat-break song I rejoice in the fact that it doesn't fully describe my feelings anymore.

Oh, sure I still miss him. Sure I'm still sad a lot.

But it's bearable. I can get through it. I don't get stuck anymore. With the help of God I can climb out of that rut easier and easier every day.

Thank God :)

In other news: I'm a senior. Officially.

Ok. Back up. What?!?

Yep folks it's true! I am a senior! A fact made all the more real to me by going to my first day of ECC on Friday. It's too crazy. I have a hard time believing it myself. But it's true! And exciting :) I feel like I can have a bigger impact than ever on the younger lives around me now. And I for sure want to make it a good one. So here's to a new school year of unending possibilities, being the top-dog, and yet making an extra effort to reach out to those around me. I pray God makes it a good one. :)

Anyway, I've really just rambled a lot today... I meant to try and write something inspiring or insightful, but we all know how my plans work out. :)

So I'll leave you with this: Sometimes we plan things in life, sometimes we get too comforatable in life, and sometimes things go wrong. But in all of this we must remember one thing: Man proposes, but God disposes.

Learning to trust in His judgement is the most important lesson to learn along the way. He's smarter than you'll ever be (shocking isn't it), He knows what's best for you, He can foresee things you can't, and He has the final say.

If you have a problem with this, just try controling and running your own life without any of His help. I think you'll find you end up in a mess.

Anyway, I shall be going now. I apologize for the bunny-trails. Have a good week! :)